Moving on ...and a letter to Eliana

 ****I am going to give a pretty generic description of what is going on with our adoption below, because writing out each detail would take pages to write, but this is a summary.

As most of you know we got a court date, set for Nov. 7 in Uganda. In the last week, the US Embassy made a high alert travel advisory. Long story short, Al Qaeda terrorists have recently attacked Kenya, who are allies of Uganda. Uganda is the biggest supporter of the African Union Mission in Somalia [AMISOM]. They have sent troops into Somalia and they are upset that they will not withdraw them. The situation is continually worsening and now businesses and schools in Kampala are closing down, as they have been alerted that the attacks are imminent.

See link below for more details...
http://worldnews.nbcnews.com/_news/2013/10/18/21025232-americans-warned-of-kenya-mall-style-terror-attack-imminent-in-uganda?lite

We are set to travel in 12 days and after speaking with our Ugandan attorney and adoption travel agent, we have decided not to travel at this time. Our judge has a very high chance of not granting us custody even if we did risk traveling there during this extremely dangerous time. Many Americans are being turned away, as our media is portraying a picture of Americans that is not very pretty. And sadly, the terrorist activity is not ending any time soon. The attorney stated that even as a Ugandan man, he is afraid for his family and on high alert even in his own home. Being American, our risk of traveling is heightened tenfold. We feel putting our own lives at risk is not fair to our children and family, no matter how badly we would love to go and swoop her up and take her away from all of that turmoil.

So what does this mean? We can not reschedule our case, we have our hands tied at this point and can not continue with our adoption in Uganda. As much as we are completely heartbroken for Eliana and selfishly for ourselves, we have to be realistic and level headed and trust that God has a much bigger reason and plan for our family.

Thank you so much to each and every one of you who has supported our adoption, and made us feel so loved during this process. I will never forget the messages from friends just to say you are praying for our adoption, donations made to help the orphanage (which by the way will STILL happen, which we are so excited to be able to do, so thank you again for buying those tshirts and donating so generously!), just pure love we received in our quest to this little person has grown friendships and taught us lessons we will forever cherish. Seeing peoples true hearts for these children and acts of love towards them..... I get teary eyed thinking about it! We don't know what the future holds for our family, whether we will add another little one or not, but we know we are beyond blessed to have 3 beautiful boys, who bring more contentment and love to our lives than we could ever have imagined before they were born. We are going to take this time to just enjoy our family and emotionally move forward.

Eliana,
We have fought for a year and a half for you, a sweet helpless little girl, that now we will never have the opportunity to meet. That in itself leaves us feeling deflated and quite simply...sad.  We don't consider this time a waste, or this process as a failure. Although our end result is not at all what we had planned...the lessons and experience through this journey has taught us more than we ever would have learned had we not had the opportunity to pursue you. We feel grateful for this process, yes we feel sad too, but if anything else, my desire to help the "least of these" that can not help themselves is even greater. I promise you I will fight as hard as I have for you, to help others just like you. Eliana, you will shine brighter than before, because now you have the power of prayer on your side, so many people, praying for YOU, an itty bitty brown eyed 21 month old beauty. You may never live the life of a princess on this earth, but in God's eyes, you are forever the daughter of a King. 

I will always pray for you, beautiful angel, and I will never forget what being an "almost mommy" to you has taught me.  Dream big sweet girl. You are loved.

COURT DATE!

Yah! We FINALLY received our court date! Nov. 7th is the actual date, but we will be leaving on Monday November 4th around 2:00 pm. We will arrive in Uganda Tuesday night around 10:30 pm , Uganda time. They are 8 hours ahead. We have 2 layovers...first is in Detroit and then Amsterdam. In Amsterdam airport, we can grab one last warm shower before arriving in Africa!

According to other adoptive parents in the process, going to court isn't so great. Every single one has waited at least 8 hours, watching criminal cases etc. and went last. Most are not passing court right now either because the judges are very weary of sending their children to America because of many things they see in the media. So if they can find any relative who is willing to even consider taking them (even if they can't support or feed them) they will do their best to keep them there.

 It's a very messy situation over there in regard to adoption. I feel optimistic about our hearing, however, I am also preparing myself for other outcomes...such as... the judge putting our hearing off...requesting meetings with the family privately at a later date, or in the worst case scenario, not to be granted guardianship of Eliana. It's a tough pill to swallow...but we have to be realistic and know that this is our reality.

With all that to say, I do believe in the power of prayer. I know that God's ultimate plan will prevail in our case. We have to trust that and believe that as hard as it may be to do. I ask for your prayers for John and I as we prepare for this trip and for court, for knowledge for our attorney, and for the judge to extend grace to us crazy Americans walking in there "taking his children". By the way, he told a friend of mine that "Americans can't just walk in here and expect to take our children easily". It's backwards and frustrating, but it's what we are dealing with.  We may or may not get a verbal ruling on that day...usually it is a week-a month (yes more waiting) before you get the written ruling. After the written ruling, we can take custody of her in Uganda and begin our exit process, which is getting a passport for her, getting a visa, taking her for a final health appt., and getting through our American Embassy (which is no easy feat.)

One step at a time....not concerned with all that follows just yet...we just gotta get through that court date!!!

Attorney letters...and an ALMOST court date:)

 I got an email from our wonderful Ugandan attorney, who proposed to the Jinja court, that our hearing be set for Oct. ..and he gave all available dates , which are every Thursday and Friday because that's when they hear adoption cases there. He sent the letter in on Sept. 12th and the Judge's assistant promised him yesterday that he would get back to him very soon with the date. So, I think it's finally going to happen...sometimes I wonder if it ever will! I keep up with adoption blogs of others adopting from Uganda and NO ONE has a date for Kampala. And the bad thing is...I don't know if they will any time soon:( I sure hope they do, so many babies ready to go home with their new family! I am so grateful for our attorney being proactive and switching the case to Jinja to move us along quicker.
Crazy thing is, the first dates were Oct. 3 or 4th, which is crazy because of travel and them being on a different time schedule, we would have to leave at the end of this month to get there a few days before. YIKES! Either way, just glad we are getting a date and moving along:)
I am getting so excited for a friend who is adopting 2 kiddos from the same orphanage (she also is going to court in Jinja and has same attorney) so she can give me the lowdown and also she can see Eliana and hug on her for us. And I will get new pics:)
Please pray for her and her husband (Natalie and Steve) to gain guardianship of their 2 children, Steven and Tracey. They are not related and are both almost 4.
That's all I have as to updates....thank you all for your love and support to bring little miss home.
Amy

Bumps in the Road

When I started this blog last year...I named it "Our Journey to Love in Uganda". I knew on this "journey" there would be lots of bumps and waits and upsets etc....but there's always a teeny bit in me that sees a challenge such as this process and thinks I think I can get through it without all of that...well...how humbling this ride has been!
I can't say we weren't warned! The endless paperwork, the massive financial responsibility, the waiting, etc., courts, judges, attorneys, directors, agencies, and then there's running your own family and life in the process. But, I honestly think that every little setback and "mistake" along the way, has been a part of this plan from the beginning.  I can't do this by myself. My husband can't do this for me. No one can get this adoption done. We are at the hands of an African government for crying out loud, of course I am not in control! ;)
So, I can sit and sulk, and talk about how stupid this is (waiting on Ugandan judges) or I can choose to learn what my lesson is in this wait. I think it's a lesson on PATIENCE, PERSEVERANCE, and ultimately, and most importantly, asking God for His guidance and not just a prayer to make it all end and get our baby home, but a prayer to thank Him for teaching us in this process, and that in His perfect time, this will all fall together.
It seems like a long time, but after speaking to most international adoptive parents, particularly African adoptions, this is completely normal, and really expected. There are very few people who go through it and don't have to endure some sort of bump in the road.
After speaking with our attorney, we have decided to move our case to Jinja court. Most cases take place in Kampala...but after court reopened in August there is only 1 judge who has reported back in and he is not at all favorable towards American adoptions. Our chances of coming home with Eliana if we went there are pretty slim. So, we are moving our case to Jinja and he said IF the registrar (whatever that is) reports this week, we will have our court date this week. And he is certain our court date will be in October. I am just happy we are doing SOMETHING besides sitting and waiting. All of us who are adopting from Uganda are in the same boat. So, next time I post, we will have a court date ! Please pray for that DATE!

An excerpt

I follow some pretty amazing blogs and I wanted to pass this along, as it describes very well my thoughts!

Staying on the Path

I came across The Brave Girls Club today, and this graphic just jumped out at me because of where I find myself in this adoption process.

I knew this wasn’t going to be an easy thing to do. Of course I knew that. I’ve said all along that the only thing easy about adoption is loving our daughter. But even knowing it was going to be tough, there are at least a dozen difficult things I didn’t know I’d face on this journey before I took the first step.

Honestly, most of the comments and reactions I’ve received have been positive. But sometimes I think that, because children are so tightly woven into their mother’s heart, the enemy attacks moms in a way that dads don’t usually experience.

I had one person ask me how I was going to keep her from becoming immersed in “thug culture.” I guess since she’s black, and we live in the south, to some people — that must be the inevitable outcome of her new life with us.

I’ve fielded intensely personal questions about financial issues, her family story and health history (including the assumption that she has AIDS — she doesn’t), crazy questions related to our motives for adopting her….

I know that most people are just curious and say what’s on their minds. They don’t know anyone who’s done this before.  And I think I’ve been gracious (or at least, I hope so) with my replies.

But I’m a thinker. And when people plant their thoughts into my mind, they immediately take root. And I wonder and question and research and pray, when what I really need to is perform the mental equivalent of spraying Round-Up on these weeds instead of allowing them to grow freely along my path.

I knew this process wasn’t going to be easy. And despite the agony of waiting forever, I can imagine that several months from now, I’m going to look back at this as being the “easy” time — like how pregnancy seems so hard until you’re several weeks into sleepless life with a colicky newborn and realize that you never before truly understood the definition of “exhausted”.

But in that sleepless haze, you also realize that you never before really understood the definition of “love”. And then the beautiful part is that with each child you add to the family, that love just multiplies.

So with every child, you get to live life at a level of love that was previously unknown to you.

It’s crazy how it works that way. That’s why I honestly believe that every child God places in my home — however he or she may come — is an blessed, welcome gift.

No matter how difficult the journey that connects us.

I’m tired, but I don’t think I’m anywhere near the end of this path. Still, I know with complete certainty that it’s the right one to take.

we are still waiting!

I haven't posted lately as I keep thinking I will wait and post when we receive our court date because honestly I thought we would have already received it! But, we are still waiting on that email that says our official court date! The crazy thing about it is..the date could very soon and we could be rushing to leave...or it could be a month away! We won't know until the judges appoint and they give their approval on the date. So we wait, as patiently as possible, and see what happens until then.:)
The boys started school and so I am SO thankful we were here to get them back into a routine and settled before we leave. Gray heads back to the ENT specialist on Monday to have his 3 week post-op surgery checkup. I am praying for a great report on his ear!
Thank you for your prayers, love, and all of your support during our wait! She is out of the hospital and recovering well per Mr. A. We gotta get this girl home and get her healthy!

update

Most of you probably already know that Eliana has had malaria again. She has been in the hospital for the past few weeks in Buwenge, Jinja and had a bad form of it that is the most fatal. The good news is she is responding well to treatment and they are hoping she gets out of the hospital soon. I try to keep most of the details private regarding her case and not get into too many details...but also try to have as many prayers and support as possible that I can from friends and family. I have been a bit frustrated regarding her health and treatment, as I haven't been very informed. Very common there from what I have heard and read, but frustrating nonetheless.
I will try to update the blog more as I hear details where everyone will know what's going on. As always..thank you for all of your prayers and love.

We got submitted to court!

What a busy last week. Gray had a major ear surgery which has a 92% success rate, he is a week post-op. He did well, we had a couple of little scares after he woke up, but everything went perfectly.

Right after surgery in recovery

His brothers have kept him company:)

We got submitted to court on Tuesday, and normally you receive a court date in a few days. However, our attorney informed us, because of court closures and new judges being appointed in Kampala, we probably won't get a date until after they reopen on the 15th of August. It is ironic how our daughter came to us right before once a year court closures. If I had to miss Gray's surgery, his first day of kindergarten, Tyler's first day of first grade, or Eli's first day back to preschool, I would have been so upset! So, as much as we want her home, the timing is actually perfect.

It's hard because we don't know when it will be, and I haven't gotten any new info...but as always on this journey,  we just have to pray and know that we are not in charge this time (or any other time we elusively think we do). God's got this handled. And attempting to micromanage Him sure is a waste of time! So we are focusing on day to day and what we have right in front of us...three little guys that are starting a new year!

Malaria Facts

Eliana was diagnosed with malaria, and was hospitalized for a few days, but is now back at the home of the orphanage director. His wife is caring for her, along with some other sick children that need care. Thankfully after receiving meds and fluids, she is slowly recovering. The great thing about malaria is once treated, it clears up quickly for most children. When we are in country, we take a daily pill to prevent contracting the virus.

Below I put some information on malaria, a very preventable disease! Uganda is the #1 country in Africa at risk for and confirmed cases of malaria.

Update..or lack thereof..

For anyone who doesn't know, I got a many of Eliana's pics day before yesterday and knew immediately she looked very sick.

After I emailed the director he said she was indeed sick...she has high fevers and "body weakness". He said he was taking her yesterday morning to the hospital and I have had no feedback since then from him. We are just praying that she is getting stronger and better but have faith God will take care of her.
I will keep everyone updated!

By the way, her tummy looks very distended in these pics...which it is to some extent, but nothing like this! She just has her hands pushing it out. I have many more where it looks more "normal".

Please pray for this little girl!!!

Amy

Prayer for a Grateful heart

Faith..

Eliana,

When we decided to move forward with you joining into our family, we knew it would come with hardships. Little did we know, it would include your sickness before we could get to you. It is so unfortunate that we can not be there to hold you in Uganda...there is nothing more a child needs in sickness than a mother's touch. However, there is thankfully a touch even stronger than this.
His touch heals when a mama is there and when she is not. His touch heals when we need Him and  when we don't even deserve to be healed. His Healing Hands are what makes my faith. The only comfort in your sickness from afar is that God always delivers. He always answers. It may not be the answer we want or think we need at the time...but the answer is ALWAYS RIGHT. It is exactly what is meant to be. And that alone..is what gives me peace....and ultimately gives me faith.
We love you from afar, and I know God brought you this far..and He isn't going to fail you now. We will be there soon.

Much Love Sweet Girl,
Mommy

Signed Affidavits!

Thank God the affidavits we will submit to court were signed today in Uganda and we will print to have notarized and will overnight today along with all the other load of paperwork to Uganda to be submitted to court. We should have a court date given within the next week of being submitted.  One more step down, very close to getting a COURT DATE:)

Thanks for all your prayers:)
Amy

Update

I will refer to our main contact in Uganda as "Mr. A" from now on...it will be easier instead of "orphanage director" every time I write an entry! So, communicated to Mr. A via email yesterday and he said that Steven is taking meds now and should be better soon. Still praying for him to recover quickly! Can you even imagine being 4 and not having a mommy to take care of you when you are so sick? That thought alone makes me so sad for him!

On another note, Eliana's grandmother and uncle are signing paperwork this Friday (getting to Kampala  (the capital city) from where they live (outside of Jinja) is a very big deal...Mr. A goes with them, and even Mr. A doesn't have a car, so they hire a driver to get them there). Her uncle is out of town now and has been for a while, working to bring home food/resources for the home, and promised to be home Thursday night where they can leave Friday.

Little by little, step by step, we are getting closer. After they sign the affidavits, we have them notarized (5 copies) and then we overnight them with all of our other mounds of paperwork, which are all notarized/blue ink yada yada.., and our attorney submits them to court to receive a court date! He did say that the courts, although closed, the clerical side of court will still give court dates, and dependent on the amount of work they have, determines the time of our court date. It could be "soon". Remember what I mentioned about "soon" in Africa? NOT the same as in the US! But hoping for an end of August court date! Prayers for that please!

I keep asking for pictures and Mr. A is getting those "soon" as well:) We shall see if we get one before court! Supposedly her new bed will be there this week...she has never slept on a bed (or probably even seen a bed!), so I know she will be so excited! She has shoes on her feet now (for the first time) and clothes and milk in her belly! My biggest concern for her is health, staying well until we can get there!

Thanks for all your prayers and support!

Prayers going up!

I spoke to a lady in Chicago today who is adopting from the same place in Uganda, a little boy and little girl. She has already been once, showed up for court, and the judge said she was too busy to see them and to come back after closures in late August! I can only imagine her disappointment since she had already met, and bonded, with the kids. This was in June, and they came home after the news. Today, she had more bad news that her son had contracted malaria (again) and was extremely ill. She doesn't really have a lot of information, but that he was in pretty bad shape, and is vomiting, diarrhea, etc...and dehydrated. Malaria kills children there all the time, so of course she is so worried and I am praying for him and her! Would you please say a quick prayer for little Steven? He is 4 years old, sweet, adorable, and very sick:(

This makes me scared for Eliana too...as she lives in the same home (well, I would call it a room), with him, and 5 other children, 2 of which are the orphanage director's children.  Please pray for all of their health, safety, and for God's healing hands on them all.

Still waiting to see what day Eliana's family will be headed to sign the paperwork this week. Will keep everyone posted!

You made the paper!

Here is the ad that is in the local Ugandan paper to announce your adoption.

THE REPUBLIC OF UGANDA

IN THE MATTER OF AN APPLICATION BY JOHN ESTIN DAVIS AND AMY GRAY DAVIS FOR LEGAL GUARDIANSHIP OF MBEDHA JOAN

 (MINOR)

GENERAL NOTICE

  Mbedha Joan

Born on 13rd January 2012

Both Father (Isabirye Bategana) and Mother (Tyamisa Aidha) are deceased.

NOTICE is hereby given to any surviving relative of the above child Mbedha Joan of Magamaga village, Buwenge Sub County Jinja District and to all whom it may concern that a Petition is being filed at the High Court of Uganda at Kampala for the Legal Guardianship of the above mentioned child. Unless you contact; The Probation and Social welfare services department of Jinja District, Shared Hope for Orphans Uganda, Buwenge Town Council Jinja District, we shall proceed with filing of the petition. 

Dated at Kampala this 11^th day of July 2013.

………………......................

M/S ANGUALIA BUSIKU & CO. ADVOCATES

COUNSEL FOR THE PETITIONERS

Drawn and prepared by;

M/s Angualia Busiku & Co. Advocates

Plot 3 Parliament Avenue,

Raja Chambers, 1^st Floor Suite No. 32

P.O. Box 27689 Kampala.

www.lawyers-uganda.com

Dear Eliana...

Eliana,

We heard from the attorney today you will be in the newspaper this Friday or Saturday (and can I tell you how cute your picture is?). This is mandatory in Uganda , to make sure all are aware of the adoption. Also, this week your grandmother and uncle will be signing a petition for you to have a forever home in the US with a mommy, daddy, and brothers. They are so excited to see you have a better life and to thrive with a family. I can't wait to meet your grandmother and ask her so many questions about you and learn about your culture.
You are truly a blessing. There are so many times in life when we have no control and no clue as to what is ahead. Adopting you is a perfect example of God's grace and perfect plan. I can think of nothing stronger than the urge of wanting to protect my children, and now...you are my child and my instinct is to want you to be safe and well.  I pray for you and hope for you, safety, until we arrive to give you more love than you can even comprehend.
We love you already and we are so grateful for the gift of you.

Mommy

Introducing....

Oh my goodness...what a couple of weeks of emotional ups and downs. Whew!

A HUGE blessing is we are moving forward...

With a sweet little 17 month old girl.   Both of her parents are deceased and she has been with her grandmother who is extremely poor and her living conditions were pretty bad. She is staying in the orphanage director's home right now with he, his wife, and kids, as she is pretty sick and malnourished and needs time to get stronger. She is a teeny little thing right now...weighs less than 20 pounds...to put that in perspective.. all of my boys weighed 20 pounds at 6 months old! She speaks Lusoga, a Ugandan language. Since she is so small, she doesn't speak much anyway, so learning English should be easy for her.

Court is closed from July15-Aug 15 so we will not be able to go until after Aug 15. We have a lot to prepare for between now and then!

We are beyond thrilled to welcome her into our family! We have decided to name her "Eliana Abigail" Eliana means "God has answered" and "Abigail means "My Fathers Joy".  We will most likely call her "Ellie". And here she is in all her cuteness...:)

Cute with a freshly shaven head!

Please pray with us that everything goes smoothly with her and we are so blessed and thankful that  "God Has Answered"!

Waiting once again...

I know many of you know that we lost the referral of little Sofia about a week ago. If you do not, the short version of the story is, after a necessary newspaper advertisement stating our adopting her, a brother of her late father came forward and would not sign the affidavit to continue with her adoption. We looked into fighting against him, however, after 3 meetings with the orphanage director as well as our Ugandan attorney, the family decided for us to cease proceeding with the case, due to family problems and their discrepancies with the American culture. We are so sad to not be able to proceed, yet we know we did all we could, and as hard as it is, these things just happen sometimes in international adoption. It's part of what we signed up for on this journey (as bad as it stinks).

So what does this mean now? We wait and although it will be hard not to get TOO attached to pictures, we will move forward with whatever child chooses for us (and that should be very soon). I have heard a couple of times of people losing 2 referrals, but odds are on our side that will not happen:)

 Once again, it's all out of our control, just prayers for our future child, and our family as we navigate through this process.

Travel shots!

John and I received our travel vaccines yesterday. We had to get 6, yes 6, shots! Yellow fever, meningitis, hepatitis A, tetanus, and 2 more I can't remember! We got medicine we will take daily for malaria while there and then continued for a week when home, and an antibiotic for both of us (with multiple refills) to take with us for not IF but WHEN we get diarrhea. Apparently it's rare NOT to pick up something while there!

Progress

I heard from our attorney in Uganda today, who has been amazing so far with communicating with us, and the newspaper advertisements have been placed. Also, her 2 surviving relatives are meeting at his office tomorrow at 2:00 to sign the affidavit that confirms their consent to the adoption After this, we sign and it is sent to court to receive our court date. Time is ticking very quickly so we are hoping and praying for that court date before court closures in mid-July!

Here is a copy below of what is in their local paper:

BIG NEWS!!!

We are so happy to finally be able to announce we have been matched!
I just knew..

A) Our baby would be a boy
B) Our baby would be a young BABY , i.e.: under 18 months
C) Our little one would come in God's perfect timing and when we least expected it

Turns out, I was only right about C....


Long story short, we were presented with an opportunity to consider a toddler, just a little over 10 months shy of Eli's age to be exact (2.5 years)...although I was a little hesitant at first, as I had not "planned " for that.   After receiving pictures of this sweet, beautiful little GIRL, praying, and just simply "having the feeling" that this is our daughter...we have accepted her and are moving forward with adopting her into our family! We are beyond excited (and many other adjectives that would be impossible to describe) and praying for a quick process to get her home!

Her name is "Sofia", we are so thankful that she has a beautiful name that we will keep! She lost both of her parents shortly after birth..lived with her sick grandmother up until about a month ago when she was relinquished to an orphanage in Jinja, Uganda.  She speaks NO English! Her language is Lugandan. Uganda's national language is English but many of the small villages speak their own languages, and hers happens to be one of those! So, we definitely have our work cut out for us with communicating for a while. The rest of her story will be hers to tell:)

We are possibly looking at a court date the week of July 8th. Court closes in Uganda for a month from July 15-Aug. 15 for rainy season so if not that week , it will have to be after court reopens in August.

So, since I have made this blog private (we can in no way ever post a picture publicly until we are officially legal guardians of her)...I can post on here:) So here she is...

The first picture we ever saw of Sofia

The most recent pic, taken last week at her medical appointment- how cute!

 The orphanage director said he would let her hair grow (they shave all girls heads) so it looks like I need to figure out quickly how to take care of it! He also told her that she has a mommy and daddy that live in the United States and will be coming for her soon and he said she is so happy and smiled really big.

We are so grateful for everyone's prayers and support and feel so blessed to be able to be on this journey. We have a lot of work ahead of us to get her here...paperwork, court, travel, etc...but now that we have a sweet face to look forward to, we know it will all be worth it.

What's going on!

Wow, it has been a while since I have posted...baseball, school getting out, vacation, etc, has kept us all so very busy! This adoption process has been challenging at times to say the least, especially since my impatient nature doesn't like to wait...but the good news is, things are moving along and soon enough we will have news to share. At this point, I do feel it will be best to make our blog private...as when we do have our little one we can share with close friends and family, without worries of anything that could potentially hurt our case. We are not allowed to show pictures of our little one publicly, when we do receive them, until we have been to court in Uganda.:( 

There have been surprises every step of the way and I know good and bad, that will continue to happen, but we are in and ready for the next step..we are SO close!

Please let me know if you do want to follow privately and I will approve it:)

Much love and thank you for all of your prayers!

Amy

A little from Mr. Lewis..

I love this so much I had to share..Happy Sunday:)

Waiting waiting..

I know, it's been SO long since I have posted! We are just waiting still so honestly there has been nothing to post! I have been planning on baby rooms- one if a girl and one if a boy..and somewhat thinking of names..but we want to wait until we have our referral until we really go into really thinking about all of the details. Reading books, reading about attachment with our little one to teach he/she who mommy and daddy are, etc. I am trying to stay away from negative blogs and books..as much as I want to be prepared for what "could" go wrong...to me, just like with pregnancy...all the things I really worried about never really happened and some of the things I didn't worry about did. So that's enough proof to me to just not allow my mind to go down that road.
We had Ty who was a preemie in the nicu at birth for a couple of weeks and then hospitalized in critical care with a 106 fever at 12 months with a respiratory infection for a week and then Gray, who was sent to the nicu bc his cord was wrapped so tightly he was blue and wouldn't cry, and then at 4 weeks suffered two skull fractures..and then at 3 months got RSV and was ill for over 8 weeks....and THEN Eli was extremely sick in critical care at Vandy at 2 weeks old with RSV. So, honestly, to say the newborn phase makes me nervous is an understatement. All I can think about with a teeny one is sickness and panic! Although the road ahead is unknown and filled with uncertainty, I have learned from my three boys to just not even plan on a "normal". And looking back on all of those times and panic and tears..I am oddly thankful to have learned so much in every situation.

I have my days when I am fine with the wait, and others I am just sick of it already! I get angry that there is so much red tape that lies in between a needy child and a family that wants to care for them. It makes me frustrated that I can't make it happen quickly. But, through this, there is also the lesson that we are in no way in control of this and never have I leaned more heavily on the words "hope" and "faith".
Thank you so much again for your support, your prayers, your words of encouragement, your donations, tshirt orders...anything and everything you have done to help this process of getting our baby home! Our coordinator said April-May so thinking this next month may be it!

Grateful on Good Friday...

It is so easy to get sucked into a thought process in your own life. For me, this week in particular, I have been waiting a little impatiently on the adoption referral, as I know many little ones are going to their new families! As I laid in bed last night, I thought..Hmm..I wonder if it will be tomorrow? This morning I woke up, began the day with the kids and every now and again, that thought would enter my mind.
It suddenly hit me that I am not thanking God nearly enough for these 4 sweet children that were referred to families this week ..they are no longer ORPHANS! They aren't MY children, but they are HIS. And that should make me anything but impatient...it should me make me overwhelmed with joy that this orphan crisis, that I have prayed for and feel so helpless about.... this week already there are FOUR less! How amazing is that?
Being Good Friday...I wanted to just think about the sacrifice He experienced on the Cross for us...the holes in his hands were not in vain, they were put there as a semblance to us, HIS adopted children, to live a life fully and freely and to share that same sacrifice and love to others that he showed to us.

I read this verse above and it made me think of when a child is no longer orphaned. That wasn't what it was in reference to in that particular verse, but it reminded me that we are the very same,....completely reliant on His grace, forgiveness, and love and ultimately, we are adopted into His kingdom. It makes me smile to know He works in His way, not ours.  So, today...I am not impatient (check back tomorrow because that may change! ha)...I am GRATEFUL.